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He loves me. He loves me not.
by Kelly Gottschalk on June 3rd, 2011

He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not. Lately, that has been my journey. The short version of this story is that I’ve been desiring to truly love God, not just do things for Him, but truly love Him. As I have prayed about it, I continue to hear God tell me “Just love Me.” Which of course, my reply is always, “How do I do that?” But I’ve now come to the realization that I can’t completely comprehend “how” to fully love God without coming to a place where I can be moved by How much He loves me.

My Life Group and others have been helpful as I’ve been maneuvering through this journey. They’ve challenged me, provided encouragement and given me several resources. One of the books recommended to me was called 1,000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp. It’s about a mom who is struggling to see God amongst all the details of her daily life and some tragic experiences that have happened in her past. She “overcomes” this by starting a grateful journal where she lists the gifts that God gives her each day. I can’t say that I would recommend the book to everyone. It’s definitely written for women and/or mothers, but the concept of a grateful journal can be beneficial to everyone to keep track of how you are blessed or loved on by God each day. I’ve also been reading through a devotional book called Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young. The messages are written as if Jesus were talking directly to you and then they are followed by several scriptures that correlate with the devotional. I’ve enjoyed reading His Word and then hearing how Jesus could have possibly wanted to encourage me if He and I were discussing the scriptures right then and there at my breakfast table.

And finally, I have found that it is easier to focus on how much He loves me when I “bombard” myself with praise and worship music or ipod casts of different messages. Don’t get me wrong, I do love 80s music, but walking through this journey, I’m really trying to renew my heart and mind, moment by moment with reminders of who He is and how He cares for me. My prayer is that this blog would be an encouragement to others who may be where I am at this point in my Christian walk. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me.

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